The whole of last year I did everything in my power to arm myself to be a better version of myself. From learning ways to empower myself to unlearning old ways that no longer served any purpose in my life, I feel I have come a long way. Shedding old notions and beliefs has been difficult but not impossible. 

My self-awareness is more heightened than ever before and the impulsive, no-filter Kamal has been replaced by one who listens more, feels more, and has almost learned how to keep quiet instead of reacting. I’m not unaware about what is whispered or said – but I choose peace nowadays. All I know is that if you attack first, I have promised myself to choose my battles and decide if it’s worth a retaliation or not. I do not need to clear my name, justify my actions or be answerable to people who do not matter at all. 

Years of therapy, journaling, growth and taking accountability for my own bullshit has allowed me to reach a point where I can proudly say that I have worked on myself, and that I am unapologetically honouring my own boundaries even if it means cutting people out of my life. The people-pleasing traits are far less, and I have noticed a lot of people have fallen out of my life. It’s a lonely journey, this one. Holding strong onto your boundaries simply means you have stopped being the one who is manipulated each time. People not able to support or respect your boundaries are the ones who have problems with the changes in you. 

On this journey, I have also found out in practice that ‘No’ is a complete sentence. There is no need to add a word salad of explanations to go with my refusal. Do you know how liberating that is?! 

While I am not perfect, I know that I have come a long way in terms of personal growth and that makes me extremely proud of myself. People-pleasing is a trait I have bade farewell to, and I welcome love and peace into my life. I also don’t need other people to validate me or tell me all that. With all the self-awareness that I have garnered, I cannot lie to myself and not be accountable for my actions and words. Having boundaries does not mean you have to be an asshole to anyone. Recognise that you need to step away from that which serves you no purpose and get on with it. No more being the bigger person or the understanding one. I will not keep quiet when I see wrong happening or turn a blind eye to any kind of bullying. 

So, as the new year starts off, it’s all about ‘New Year, Consistent Me’. 

Here’s to renewed hope, growth and success in being a better version of myself. 

Happy 2025!