The world shifts on its axis when you lose a parent. But when you lose both, the ground beneath you seems to dissolve entirely. A month ago, I said goodbye to my father, and in doing so, I found myself revisiting a grief I thought I’d navigated years ago. Seven and a half years, to be precise, since my mother’s sudden departure.

The loss of my father, though deeply painful, carried a strange sense of closure. We had time, precious time, to talk, to explore life’s mysteries, and to find a fragile acceptance. There was a gentle farewell, a sense of a chapter closing. My mother’s passing, however, was a raw, unexpected tear in the fabric of my life. It took seven years, years of counselling and relentless effort, to stitch those edges back together, to find a semblance of peace.

Now, with my father gone, those old wounds have reopened. The grief for my mother, once a dull ache, has flared into a sharp, piercing pain. It’s as if losing my father has unearthed the unresolved grief I carried for her, reminding me of the abruptness, the finality, of her absence. It’s a strange, disorienting experience, grieving for two people simultaneously, navigating the echoes of past pain alongside the fresh wound of present loss.

This journey, this double grief, feels uncharted. There are no maps, no clear paths to follow. All I know is that I must keep moving. Not to outpace the pain, but to keep it from overwhelming me. The world continues to turn, and the pace of life, relentless as it is, demands that I keep putting one foot in front of the other.

My heart aches with a profound love for both my parents. They were my anchors, my guiding stars, and now, they are both gone, but their love, the lessons they taught me, the memories we shared – these remain. They are the fragments of light I cling to in the darkness.

To anyone navigating the treacherous terrain of grief, especially the layered grief of losing both parents, know that you are not alone. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, no timeline to follow. Be gentle with yourself. Allow yourself to feel, to remember, to mourn. Keep moving, however slowly, towards healing. Their love remains, a constant, unwavering presence in your heart.