In case you’re wondering what’s going on, it’s been in the news quite a bit, and also it’s been going pretty viral on social media, that Maggi noodles have been banned in India because they tested for high levels of MSG, therefore making them unfit for human consumption.

A nation almost fell apart at this because Maggi Noodles in India are huge! I know this not from the television commercials but from experience. Maggi Noodles are considered nurturing food that mum makes with all her love, it’s for students who want a quick fix to keep the hunger grumps away, it’s for grown ups and kids alike and they’re made to make you feel satisfied. Maggi is huge in India, I tell you, huge!

So when you hear it is being banned a nation goes into mourning and memes come up on social media. Then come the conspiracy theorists who, because they can’t blame their parents, spouse, neighbour or anyone else they feel like blaming, they must blame the government like any responsible citizen will. Or God. God gets blamed for a lot of atrocities as well but in the Maggi Noodle story, people decided to blame Modi for it.

Narendra Modi was most probably minding his own business, enjoying a bowl of Maggi noodles, flipping the pages of his daily favourite newspaper when he’s hit with the news that Maggi will be no more. He is probably just as devastated as the common Indian man but because of his position, someone has to be blamed for it.

I have no idea how he got blamed and I don’t really care. What I find laughable is that Maggi Noodles got banned in India because they are unfit for human consumption yet there are so many eateries on the roadsides of India, with the poorest of poor hygiene conditions, serving up food which have high levels of fecal matter in them and yet no one bats an eyelid at that.

It’s completely beyond my understanding that when one tries to piece this whole thing together to make head or tail out of it, someone somewhere will pounce on you for talking ill of Narendra Modi. I have no idea how people jump to these conclusions. I just discussed the traces of fecal matter found in foods served at roadside eateries and the next thing I know I was being called a ‘presstitute’ – a term used to describe Modi haters, apparently.

There are no clean water facilities at these eateries. People do their potty jobs all over the place. They have nowhere to thoroughly wash their hands, they wipe them on the towel hanging over their shoulder that is used to wipe plates and tables at this eatery, hence a cycle is born of spreading a form of disease. This hasn’t been a matter of urgent issue for people but the banning of Maggi Noodles has.

Prioritise people! Also I don’t really care for noodles or what you think of my opinion of Narendra Modi because I don’t really have one. I just don’t want to die of food poisoning when I’m eating gol-gappas at a roadside eatery just because I ingested the server’s germs. You get me? Good.